Great jokes.More laughs ! 2

Chapter two : Marital Bliss
i) Title : Angel

First guy (proudly) : My wife is an angel.

Second guy : You're lucky. Mine is still alive.

ii) Title : Jealous wife

My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day, she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

iii) Title : Burglar alarm

Suzi woke up around 2am and told her husband, "I think there's a burglar in the house. Tip-toe downstairs, and hit him over the head. But if there's nobody there, bring me back a glass of water.

iv) Title : Near perfect

A woman is looking at the bedroom mirror.

She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment."

The husband replies, "Your eyesight's almost perfect, darling!"

haha ^^